


Try

by Seana26



Category: Chicago Fire
Genre: F/M, Kelly Severide x you, Kelly severide x reader - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-10
Updated: 2019-07-20
Packaged: 2019-09-15 15:46:06
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,536
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16936077
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Seana26/pseuds/Seana26
Summary: After Shay's dead you start work at 51.  Not everyone is happy about it, but you try your best to fit in.WARNING: no grammar and general mistakes. English isn't my first language





	1. Try

You felt exactly like it was the first day of school, you hated school, mostly because you have never found friends there. You were new in firehouse 51, no one was happy about it after what happened to Shay. You met her once and that one impression was enough to know that you will never feel like home there. It was your work, and you promise yourself that you will do anything to work hard and in peace with yourself.  
Before you could say anything, you saw a large man walking towards you, you assumed it’s Chief Boden and you didn’t know why your face lit up.

“Boden,” he said, smiling and lifting his hand up to shook yours, “pleasure to have you here.”

“(Y/N) (Y/L),” you shook his hand, “pleasure is mine.” you smiled.

“Come with me, I will introduce you to everyone.”

You entered a room where all firefighters were sitting and laughing, you knew that there is one more woman except you, but you couldn’t see her yet. You looked around before Boden catches their attention and introduce you. In the corner, you saw a man, large, sad man with blue eyes. You recognize him from somewhere, but you couldn’t remember where did you see him before.

“It’s (Y/N) (Y/L) she’s a new paramedic and will work with Dawson. I hope you will treat her well and help her with anything she would need.”

When Boden left the room, you meet the whole team, Otis and Cruz seemed nice, but they definitely wanted to flirt with you, even though they didn’t know how. At once you saw the guy, the one who you didn’t remember, and after a second you decided to introduce yourself to him.

“Hi! I’m (Y/N), nice to meet you..” you smiled, waiting for his response.

“Lieutenant Severide.”

“It’s your name? Lieutenant?” you smiled again.

“No, but I don’t need new friends and you definitely don’t have to know my name,” he said, leaving the room.

“Don’t pay attention to him.” you heard a female voice, “he went thru a lot and still need time to recover. I’m Dawson, we will work together it seems.”

“(Y/N), nice to meet you...I didn’t hear your name, but maybe you just don’t tell it to strangers.”

“Sorry, I'm just getting used to people call me by my last name,” she smiled, “Gabriela. You can call me Gabby or Dawson.”

“I’m sorry...Just…” you looked at Severide.

“It’s hard for him...for us.”

“Ambulance 61, Squad 3 and truck 81. Two people stuck in the house.” the siren filled the room.

“We have to go, stay close to me and everything will be okay,” Dawson said, leading to the ambulance.

You almost jump to it, trying to cool off after all that happened, all the people you met and what you have to deal with before you came here, it was just a huge baggage. After your seatbelts clicked, you turned to Dawson, she was focused on the road, driving fast and after you think a bit about what would make you a bit more comfortable in her area, your voice filled the space.

“I know it’s not the best time, but...I just want to tell you something to make things clear.”

“You have two minutes before we get there,” she said, without looking at you.

“I’m so sorry for your loss.” you said, looking at her, “I’m here, not to replace her, it’s impossible, but I want you to know that...I’m not very good in making friendships, meet friends and stuff, but I’ll do everything to work hard and not let you down,” you said.

“Thank you.” was everything she whispered.

******  
This wasn’t what you think it will be, the house was on fire, you saw the flames licks the bricks, smoke escaping from the windows without the glass parts, you thought it will be two people, but it turns out there is so much more to save. Illegal fabric of clothes was occupied by at least twenty people, mostly woman and kids. You looked around trying to treat as many patients as you could when you notice a boy with the head between his knees. In a place like this, with plenty of people around you, he was probably missed.

“Hey. I’m (Y/N). Is something hurts you? You were in the building?”

“Leave me alone.” he whispered.

“I’ll when I will be sure you are okay.”

“Leave me alone!” he shouted, lifting his hand with the metal object in it.

For a moment you didn’t know where you were. This metal object pointed at you were the small gun, you didn’t know if someone is looking at you, at your struggle and for the first time you felt more scared than before. You looked him right in the eye and finally spoke, trying to stop your voice from shaking.

“Hey. I’ll leave you alone okay.” you took a step back.

At once you felt someone's presence, someone was standing behind you and saw everything that happened. That boy felt that too and directed the gun right at Severide whose look was jumping from the boy to you. He took a step towards the boy, but before he notices it the boy jumped from the ground lifting his gun. Severide froze just like you, you didn’t know what he wanted to do and for a first time this day, you regret the meeting with the lieutenant.

“Hey!” you made the boy look at you, “he’s the firefighter. He has to go there and save people, you wanted to leave right? If you hurt him, it won’t be that easy.”

“Go back!” he shouted.

“Okay,” you took a step back, standing in front of Severide, making your body shields his.

“What are you doing?” he hissed behind you.

“Shut up.” you hissed back. “You can go now. Nothing and no one will stop you.”

You saw relief on boys face, he looked at you hiding his gun to the pocket, when he was already gone, you saw Boden looking at you two. You were sweat and your hands were shaking. Boden took a step towards you, putting his hand on your shoulder.

“Good job,” he whispered.

“Good job?” Severide yelled, “he could kill her! She should let me take care of it instead of playing the hero.”

You turned around to face him, your face was red and you didn’t know if it was adrenalin or the fact he had a problem with you, but before you know it, you were standing in front of him, your noses almost touched.

“Thank you will be fine and I’m not the one who plays hero here, I got it, but you decided to step in and save poor woman. I don’t know what you have against me, but spill it or shut up and let me work….lieutenant,” you said, leaving him with a confused look.

******

“What happened there? Are you okay?” Dawson rushes to you, giving you a hug.

“Yes. I got this, but “lieutenant hero” decided to step in my way.” you said, jumping to the ambulance with Dawson.

“You like him,” she said, starting the engine.

“I am not!” you shrugged.

“Well, he likes you for sure,” she said, driving back to the firehouse.  
“Are you kidding me? He didn’t even tell me what’s his name and when that guy points a gun on us, he wanted to beat him! Like he would have any chance with us.” you shouted.

“That’s how it works in his world. Severide is a protective type, if he likes you, he will do anything to make you safe.”

“Well, not my business. He can do whatever he wants, just don’t step in my way,” you said, looking thru the window.

********  
The firehouse was silent, it’s been two weeks since you started the job there and everything went in the right direction. You still couldn’t understand Severide and you tried to avoid him as much as you could.  
Gabby was so sweet for you to like the guys and the chief, your favorite was the firehouse dog, you would pet her for hours until the sirens went off and brought you to action. At once you felt the hand on your shoulder, you jump out of your chair almost stepping at the dog, your heart beat faster, but after a moment you realize it was Dawson who brought food to join you for breakfast.

“Sorry, I didn’t want to scare you.”

“It’s okay.” you smiled, sitting back at your chair.

“I was wondering if I mention that we, Otis, Hermann and I are owners of a bar nearby? Molly’s is the best place and I thought you could come to join us for drink or something,” she asked, grabbing a bite from her sandwich.

“You didn’t and I’d love too! I’m here about two months and I’m still getting lost sometimes…”

“Don’t worry Casey will pick you up.”

“Lieutenant?” you tilted your head.

“Don’t worry, he’s nice and he’s my boyfriend so will be extra nice or I’ll talk with him.”

“He’s your boyfriend?” you asked shocked, “good I didn’t tell that he’s cute or something.” you smiled.

“Well, he is, no doubts about that. I’m not jealous type…”

“Ha! I bet you are,” you said, petting Pouch head.

“Yeah, I am,” Gabby said, lifting her sight.

You both laugh when your eyes met, you liked Gabby so much, she was nice, supportive and your lack of social skills doesn’t bother her. You were talking about stupid things until you saw a figure in front of you, you lifted your head and looked into Severide’s eyes.

“I…” he started.

“Ambulance 61, Squad 3 and truck 51. The fire of the building.”

You were curious what he wanted to say, but before he could finish, you both had to be in trucks. You took everything you need and jumped to ambulans where Dawson was starting the engine. She looked at you with a smile, you know what she was thinking about Severide, but you couldn’t admit it, not now. It was too soon for you to move one, to be honest, you both know each other to short. The only thing you wanted was to have a friend in him, which was impossible because he hates you.


	2. Try part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After Shay's dead you start work at 51. Not everyone is happy about it, but you try your best to fit in.  
> WARNING: no grammar and general mistakes. English isn't my first language

You thought that after what happened during last call, you will be ready for everything, but after what you saw, you weren't that sure. The house was ready to get in, you took the bag and Dawson took the chair, you both looked at each other with the same confused look. You looked at the truck of Squad 3, Severide’s team was still in the building, checking the place. You didn’t know what you were looking for, the building was dark from smoke, the fire eaten the walls, photos on them and the whole lives of the people who lived here, but Boden wanted to make sure everything was checked before all of you get back to the firehouse.  
You walked behind Gabby, she was looking around just like you, probably thinking the same things about people who lived here, when at once you were knocked out, feeling someone’s heavy body on yours. You didn’t know what happened or what’s going on until you saw Severide’s body hovering over yours, shielding your body from piece of embers, you looked at him and after a moment you noticed bricks falling from the roof in the place you were standing only seconds ago, heavy bricks made a huge hole tracing to the basement.

“T-thank you,” you whispered.

“It means we are even.” he smiled.

That smile, that spark in his eyes and the thing he was almost lying on you make you feel the chill running thru your spine. After a moment of staring at Severide, you finally get up, and after a second you knew. You like Severide more than you should.  
At once you heard Chief’s voice thru the radio, you knew that everyone saw what happened which makes you blush a little, you all also knew construction of the building was damaged, you took your things from the floor and walked gently behind Dawson again.

“Now, will you tell me that he doesn’t like you?” she whispered.

“It’s his job Dawson, he didn’t jump on me for pleasure,” you said before you think how it would sound.

“Well, I see you change your mind a bit if it takes to Severide.”

“You have one minute. The construction can collapse any minute.” you heard Boden’s voice.

You grabbed Gabby’s arm, pulling her to the door, you didn’t know what you were looking for here, Chief wanted you to find something, anything that could bring hope to this family. When you were already leaving the building, you found a toy under your feet, it was little panda with brown eyes and socks, you took it from there, hoping it’s the sigh the family would need in bad times. When you looked at the right, you saw Severide staring at you, you couldn’t tell what was in his eyes, something that make you feel better after what you all saw in this burned house.   
Dawson was teasing you whole way back about how you blushed every time when Severide was looking at your direction.

*******  
You decided to visit Molly’s after your shift, you went home, trying not to get lost again, to change your cloths and eat. Gabby assures you that Matt will be more than happy to pick you up, but for you, it doesn’t feel right. You couldn’t stop thinking about Severide, about his blue eyes and that sadness he carries in them. You took a shower, make your hair wave a bit and later tried to decide what to wear. You didn't used to a cold nights in Chicago so you picked the tight jeans, blouse with V-neck that end at the line of your breast showing a bit of your dark blue bra and pink tennis shoes with leather jacket. You looked good, enough for the night in the bar. You put some lip gloss and use a bit of mascara and after a second you were ready to leave.

Molly’s looked better than you thought, wooden floors, bar and nice people not mentioned the amazing wooden doors. You found Gabby in a moment you entered the bar, you both hugged and after a second Otis and Cruz were already by your side pouring some alcohol to the glass.

“The place is amazing,” you said, sipping a bit of liquid. “And those doors.” you pointed in that direction.

“We found them with Matt, he helped me renovate it,” Dawson said, smiling.

“That’s how you two end up together?” you asked curiously.

“No, I was with Peter then.”

“Peter? Peter Mills?”

“Yes.” she blushed.

“Girl, you are full of surprises I see.”

“Maybe.” she said, “look who’s here.”

At once you turned around, looking at the same direction as Gabby. He entered the bar and immediately found boys from his Squad. You thought that your relationship was better, but after an hour you decided to go home.  
After all, you’ve been thru, a friend, was the only thing you needed. Gabby was amazing, but her attention was split in half when Matt was around and you couldn't blame her. You were new in the firehouse and you knew that it needs time, so they would like you. You hugged Dawson and say goodbye to the whole team, took your jacket and go outside.   
You felt the cold wind on your face when you were waiting for a cab, Chicago wasn’t that bad after all, you had a place to stay, job and memories that keep you together in bad days. At once you felt someone’s hand on your shoulder, you thought that you left something and Gabby decided to bring it to you, but it wasn’t her.

“Severide?” you asked, looking at him.

“Yeah, you know...I want to make it clear,” he said, giving you a bottle of beer.

“I thought we did. You saved me and I saved you,” you said, sipping a bit from your bottle.

“I want to explain why I was...such an ass…” he took a deep breath, “Shay is...Shay was my best friend. We lived together, drink together, she even cope with me while I was too drunk to go home.” he looked at you, “I’m scared to find another best friend you know, and when I saw those falling bricks….I didn’t want to lose another teammate. I want to be your friend (Y/N). You seemed nice and I have to tell you that I can’t remember when someone yelled at me as you did.”

“You welcome,” you smiled, “I never wanted to replace her. It’s impossible to do.” you gave him sad smile.

At once you saw his eyes become glassy, you have never seen a man crying in front of you and that was something that makes you weak. You didn’t know what happened to you, but in a second he looked at you with those sad eyes something brock in you and before you know it, you were hugging him tightly.

“I’m sorry.” you said, trying to move from the hug, “Lieutenant,” you added.

“My name is Kelly.” he whispered, hugging you tighter, “can I buy you another drink?” he asked, losing his grip.

“Always.” you smiled.

After you both entered Molly’s the whole team looked at you, you catched Dawson’s sight and smiled. You stood by the table with Kelly and his squad, laughing all evening. For the first time you felt like home, they were your home.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter, as always English isnt my firdt language, sorry for mistakes.   
> Let me know what you think in comments.

Four weeks had passed since you spend an amazing night at Molly’s. You and Severide were closer than you ever were with any human being, you spend time with each or after work or eat lunch at the firehouse. Severide opened up a bit to you, he told you about his fiance and Renee, women who told him she’s carrying his baby and his father who was nowhere around when Kelly was teen. You liked the time he invited you to his, Dawson and Casey home. You were watching movies, or drink wine and talk almost the whole night. It was nice to have someone around, someone you trust and someone who cares about you then no one ever did.

The next few shifts were a lot calmer than you first one, you spend some time with Dawson, talking and laughing while sitting by the table. Your side was covered with newspapers and filled with numbers to the people who wanted to rent rooms.

“What’s this?” Dawson’s asked with her mouth full of sandwich.

“I need a new place,” you answered with a shy smile.

“What’s wrong with the one you have?”

“Well, the guy I rent it from have...pets.”

“Don’t you tell me you don’t like sweets cats?” Otis asked.

“I’m fine with cats and dogs as you can see.” you pet Patch furry head, “but he has other...furry friends.”

“Other one?” Kelly asked, sipping his coffee.

“Rats.” you whispered, “he is feeding rats…”

“No way!” Dawson said, putting her sandwich on the plate.

“Yeah, they have names too, but every time I want to see a nice place it turns out its rent by a bald, horny fifty-something guy. I use pepper spray once.” you took a deep breath.

“Well, you could look for something together.” Peter said, mashing the food, “Lieutenant also look for own space right?”

You looked at Severide who was already staring at you, he lifted his eyebrow and attack you with this sweet smile of his, it was something mischief in that smile, but you couldn’t help but smile yourself. At once you realized how stupid idea it was, you knew each other for a month or so and it was stupid to even ask him to live with you, even as roommates.

“I'm in!” Severide almost screamed.

“You are?” you asked, blinking fast.

“Come with me,” he said, taking you by your elbow and walking outside of the firehouse.

You weren’t sure about what is happening, your thoughts run like crazy and you hoped that no one saw your blushing face. You wanted to try, you wanted to be Kelly’s roommate and know him even better, but you were afraid of that. Afraid of repeat the Shay situation. They were best friends, lived together long and you weren’t prepared to be compared to her. So you made a quick plan to change the situation.

“It’s the best idea ever!” he said, smiling.

“Kelly…”

“No, let me finish, we already spend so much time together, you slept on Casey and Dawson couch because we talk whole night and I think we would be great roommates. We like the same stuff and drink together is fun too. What do you say?”

“I...Are you sure? You spend a lot of time with other girls...like I don’t want to interrupt with your uhm ‘dates’.”

“You won’t. I promise to behave.”

“Kelly.” you looked down on the ground, “I don’t want to bring memories.”

“What memories?” he asked.

“You and Shay. I don’t want you to suffer,” you said, with a cracked voice.

“Hey,” he hugged you tightly, kissing the top of your head, “I could be dead by now. I spend a lot of time at bars, drinking till bartender took my keys. I feel like we meant to be friends.”

“You...ugh” you smiled, “I hate you.”

“That means yes?” he asked, holding you by your shoulders.

“Yes.” he laughs, “I have one place I want to go, but I’m worried about uhm, old, horny guys. Will you go with me?”

“Yes and I have a favour” he said, looking at you.

“Wow, only a few minutes and you already need a favor.” you tilted your head, “shot.”

“Next time if any guy will try to hurt you, just call me okay?” he kissed your forehead.

“Ambo 61, Squad 3 and Truck 81, fire with the possibility of building collapsing.” you both run to your trucks.

“We’ll go after the shift to see that place you picked okay?” Kelly yelled being already inside of the truck.

“Okay.” you smiled, jumping to the ambo with Dawson.

******  
You both entered the house you picked, it was a nice loft with two bedrooms, a bright living room, and modern kitchen. It has two floors, on the top one, there was a large room filled with bookshelves, sofa and large TV, on first one there was bright living room, kitchen, bedrooms and not so big bathroom.  
Since the moment you came in, your mouth became open, you couldn't imagine a better place to live and it has nothing to do with your current position and ‘pets’ of your roommate. The only problem was that you were sure the place is out of your league. It was too expensive for you, you turned to Kelly and looked at him with sadness in your eyes.

“You don’t like it?” he asked with concern on his face.

“I love it!” you said, “but there is no chance I can afford that kind of apartment, even spilling the cost at two of us.”

You looked at the apartment once again, you felt like something heavy crush your chest and you were sure that you will cry in a moment. You didn’t want Kelly to look at you, so you pretend to look at the bedroom once again, leaving him with a man who wanted to rent that place.

Kelly looked behind you, making sure you won’t hear him from the bedroom. He turned to the man to face him and after a moment his whisper filled the small space between them. He wanted to make you happy, he had never felt that way to any woman in his life, but it just felt the right thing to do.

“What could I do to make you lower the price?”

“Look, I already did that, it’s a good location and the view. People could rent it just for the view,” he admitted.

“Okay, so can I have a favor then?”

“Sure,” he answered, suspicious.

“Tell her we negotiated and you lowered the rent for about 300$. I’ll pay it.”

“Your girl is so lucky,” he said.

“It’s not my girlfriend, we’re friends,” Kelly said, looking at the man.

“I’ll lower it for about 150$. She is lucky to have you and don’t get me wrong, but even the best friend wouldn’t do that for another.”

You entered the kitchen, looking at the apartment for the last time. Your cheeks were a little wet from crying and you hoped that Severide won’t notice it. You stood in front of him, looking at his bright smile.

“Guess what!” he yelled.

“What?” you asked.

“We can afford it! This lovely guy just lower the price and we’re moving in!” he said, looking at you.

“No way!” you yelled, jumping into Kelly’s arms, “really?”

“Yes,” he said, looking at the man, who was now smiling at him.

*******  
You were sitting with Dawson showing her the photos you made yesterday. The new bathroom, modern kitchen and second floor with an amazing view and wall full of space for your books. You didn’t even notice Severide, who was looking at you with a smile on his face.

“No way.” Casey said, sitting next to him, “you and (Y/N)?”

“No, of course not. We just rent an apartment together,” he answered, looking at the newspaper.

“I know how much cost that place! No way she can afford that.”

“That’s why we rent it together- roommates and don’t whine since tomorrow you and Dawson will have your apartment back. I must say the walls are too thin.”

“Don’t change the subject! How much you had to add to her part?”

“Casey,” Kelly took a deep breath, “not much,” he added.

“How much?” he repeated.

“150$.” Kelly answered, “but it doesn’t matter. Look how happy she is.” he smiled again, looking at your happy face.

You were talking about the apartment for all way to the hospital. You and Dawson were finishing your shift and you couldn’t hide your excitement. You can move into the new house, Severide had a shift, but he told you that most of his things are already there, you still have two suitcases to take from the old apartment so you decided to ask Dawson to pick them up on the way to the firehouse.

“Can we go to my old place? I would like to take my two last suitcases.”

“Sure, you are very excited,” Dawson said, looking at the road.

“YES!” you shouted, “I love that place, it’s bright, modern, cozy and just dreams come true and the guy lower the rent a bit so I can afford that!”

“Yeah? It’s not very usual to lower the rent here,” she said, looking at you.

“What do you mean?”

“Nothing.” she smiled, “give me the address, we will pick up your things.”

*******  
You jumped from the ambulance, looking for your keys in the pockets. You decided that Dawson will stay outside, not only because she is scared of rats, but also because it wasn’t the best neighborhood to leave ambulance without anyone inside.

“Give me five minutes.” you smiled, still excited at leaving that place.

You entered the dark hall of your old apartment, you weren’t sure if it was always so dark here, but before you could think about it you saw your stuff near room entrance. You put the envelope with cash for last rent and you were ready to leave when suddenly you felt someone's hand on your mouth, your eyes opened wide when you heard the voice filled the room.

“You didn’t think that you just walk away. You have to do something to make up to me that you left me.” you felt his other hands trail down to the hem of your shirt.

You couldn’t say anything or scream, his hands were roaming on your body which makes you sick. He was always a quiet guy, you thought he isn’t dangerous, but your current position made you fell another way now. He turned you around and push you to the wall, pinned your hands above you. You would never guess he is so strong. You shivered when one of his hands tucked under your shirt, resting on your breast. At once you felt the cold wind coming from the door, you didn’t know how it could happen, the door was closed, but after a second you saw your ex-roommate on the ground, crying from pain.

“Are you okay?” you heard Dawson’s voice.

“Y-yes.” you murmured, shutting your eyes.

“Go, I’ll take your stuff,” she said, giving you the ambo keys.

You were riding back to the firehouse, you tried your best to not to cry in front of Gabby. You knew that she was pissed at you, for not screamed or fighting back, but you froze. You couldn’t speak or move, the only thing you wanted was a hot shower to wash off his scent and fell of his touch on your body. When Dawson pulled off the ambo, you almost run away from the car.

“(Y/N)! Wait!” she screamed, caught the attention of the Squad.

“Hey! What’s wrong?” Kelly asked almost immediately.

“We were at her old house, she entered it alone and there was a guy…” she took a deep breath, “she should tell you it, not me.”

Kelly didn’t wait any longer, he almost runs after you, storming the bathroom door. He looked at you, your eyes were red and puffy from crying. You tried to cover it, but you failed, he just took a step towards you, turning you gently to face him.

“What happened?” he asked, looking at you.

“Nothing,” he mumbled.

“So you cry for nothing?” Kelly asked, lifting your head.

“He…” you started, “he touched me.” you close your eyes.

“He did what?” Severide asked while clenching his fist. “what did he do?”

“Kelly, it doesn’t matter. It’s okay now.”

“No, I told you that if any guy will hurt you…”

“He didn’t. Dawson saved me, “I...I froze Kelly. I couldn’t speak and I didn’t fight back.” one of the tears fell from your eyelashes. “He pinned me to the wall and...put his hand under my shirt.”

Kelly’s jaw clenched, he wanted to kill that guy with his bare hands. He pulls you closer to his warm body, hugging you so tight you thought you couldn’t breathe. You inhale his scent, breathing in and out and after a few moments, you felt better. Being with Severide always make you better, he really cared about you and you couldn’t say that about a lot of people.

“Today, we will move into our new, fancy apartment. We’ll eat ice creams from the box and watch movies okay? I have one more thing to do after the shift, I promised Cassey something. I’ll call a cab for you okay? You have all your stuff?”

“Yes, I took two last suitcases.” you gave him small smile.

“Okay,” he kissed your forehead, “we’ll see in our new apartment okay.”

“Okay,” you answered, smiling.

*****  
Kelly’s car parked in front of the building, Casey was looking at his friend, trying to talk with Severide about his plan. Casey had never seen his friend like that, he was furious with something in his eyes that started to worry Matt.

“Let go Sev, we will report him and Jay with taking care of that.”

“Would you say this of it was Gabby?” Severide asked.

“Gabby’s my fiance, it’s totally different.”

“It’s the same thing, I...like (Y/N). She helped me after…” he took a deep breath, “Shay’s dead.” he finished.

“Okay.” Matt said, looking at Kelly, “what’s the plan?”

“You just stay here. I’ll talk with him.”

Severide walked fast to the house, he knocked to the door waiting for that guy to open. He was too stupid not to open the door. Kelly looked around, making sure that no one looked at his car and Matt in it when suddenly the door opened with a klick.

“What?” The guy said, looking at Severide.

“Remember the girl you touched without her permission?”

“Dude! That hottie had adept, she was hot,” he mumbles.

Severide’s blood boiled, he pushed him into the house. Kelly punched him several times, the bloodstream on the floor and walls. After a second he pulled out of the guy, he looked at him and stood up, towering over his beaten body.

“You will look at her or touch her once again and I’ll kill you,” he said. Leaving the room.

********  
You heard the door was opening at the moment you pull out the snacks from the oven. You were now a bit calmer, trying to forget about what happened. You turned around to face Kelly. He was putting his jacket on the hanger. You looked at him, scanning his look, his hand was red from blood.

“What happened?” you asked, lifting his hand.

“Casey asked me for help and wood fell on it. It’s okay now.” he kissed your forehead.

“Are you sure? We have to clean it. Sit down.”

“No. It’s fine.” he answered, “I promised you to ice cream and movies.” he lifted the box with your favorite flavor.

“Yes! you smiled, “I found some CDs, I’m sorry I look for it in your boxes.”

Kelly looked at the CDs with Shay’s handwriting. He was happy you found them, it was something he wanted you to know about him. Severide touched your hand, he lifted it to kiss your knuckles and after a second finally spoke.

“I and Shay filmed it all.” he took a breath in, “would you watch it with me?”

“Yes,” you said, curled against his site.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Warning: mentions of rape.

You slowly opened your eyes, letting them use to the morning sun. At once you felt something warm on your stomach, your eyes popped open with fear when you looked down. Severide’s head was laying on your stomach, his hands tangled around your waist. You tried to move but his grip was so tight you just let go of that idea, instead of that you touched his hair, caressing it a bit while at once your voice filled the space.

“Wake up sleepy head,” you whispered into his ear.

Kelly’s eyes opened slowly, his head still nuzzles on your stomach, his hands stretched slowly while he finally understood where he is. His eyes popped open almost as fast as yours only minutes before.

“I’m sorry.” he almost jumped out of the sofa, “we….I…,” he mumbled under his nose.

“Hey! It’s okay. We fall asleep watching.” you smiled, trying to make it cool, “I bet everything hurts, it wasn't the best position to sleep.” you added.

“It was quite nice.” he smiled, scratching his head, “you want to go to the bathroom as first?” he asked.

“No, go and I will make coffee for us.”

You had made a coffee and the breakfast for both of you and when you finally finished you had some time to think about what happened. You really liked Severide, he treats you better than any guy you met, but the problem was you fall in love with him, you knew it will ruin the friendship, work together and you still don’t know what you would do if he will bring one of the girls into your house. It was too painful to only think about, you sat on the counter, swinging your legs and waiting for him to leave the bathroom.

“Done.” you heard his voice, “your turn now.”

You turned your head to face him, your sight slipped on his naked chest while you desperately try not to look at the towel wrapped around his waist. You could swear that his smile made you blush even more. You hopped from the counter, trying to focus on his eyes, but every time you looked at this guy, your brain betrayed you.

*******  
The day went slowly compared to the week you had, living with Severide was something you didn’t quite understand. Everyone told you about him being playboy, having a lot of girls, sometimes every night, but it’s been a week and you didn’t notice any. You wanted to ask him about it, but you were just too scary to have that answer from him. At once Kelly appeared in front of you with a cup of coffee, his eyes sparks and his smile made your knees weak.

“We have to make a party.” he announced, giving you the red cup with a dark liquid, “we rent a new house and we have to make a party.”

“Do I have to remind you that we still have boxes all over the place?” you smiled, sipping slowly.

“I’ll work on it.” he smiled again, “Please, please!” he touched your hand, making you shiver.

“Okay! Okay!” you said, “you’re lucky I like you.” you sight.

He almost jumped from excitement, making you smile even more before you know it, he put a small kiss on your forehead and run to the Squad table to announce a party. You saw him gesticulate with a huge smile on his face. You loved him like that, you loved him in any other way too, but you knew that it’s impossible to tell him that, it would ruin your friendship.

“What’s all about?” Gabby asked, walking behind you.

“We’re making a party it seems, you smiled, you and Casey are invited for sure.”

“Thanks,” she bites her lip, “can I ask you something.”

“Sure,” you answered.

“Did Kelly bring any girl to your new apartment?”

“No, I thought about it too, I mean everyone told me he is a player, but who knows maybe that's why we are making the party.” you gave her a bitter smile.

“Don’t think so,” Dawson said, “I think he has feelings for you.”

“Oh, stop. We’re just friends.” you brushed her off, “let’s go, I’m hungry,” you said quickly.

*******  
You entered the flat after making some grocery shopping, you didn’t ask Kelly how exactly that party will look so you decided to help him a bit. When you entered the kitchen the delicious smell hits you, making your mouth water. You put the groceries on the counter, walking slowly behind Kelly, you were so quiet he didn’t even notice your presence until your voice filled the room.

“I know why girls want to date you,” you said with a smile, “it looks and smells amazing.”

“It’s not why girls want to date me,” she smirked, “you want to try it?”

“Yes,” you said quickly.

“Be careful, it’s hot,” he said, lifting the spoon with the food to your mouth.

You lean in a bit, trying not to put your hair in it. He gave you a bit to try, you closed your eyes letting the taste overwhelmed you. You opened it quickly with a smile on your face.

“Sweet God, it’s delicious!” you shouted.

“Thank you.” he put the spoon to the pan, “you better get dress, people can be here any minute.”

“Yes sir,” you said, walking to your room.

It takes you an hour to get ready, you straighten your hair, put a bit of makeup and chose to only good dress you own. Black with bareback, you were always afraid that it will show too much. You stood in front of the mirror for some time before left your room. Your house was full of people, mainly your colleagues and some of the people you don’t know.

“Oh my…” you heard the male voice behind you.

“Hi!” you answered, didn’t know who the man was, “I’m (Y/N) and you?”

“Andy, I’m Kelly’s friend.”

“Nice to meet you.”

“The pleasure is mine.” he said, licking his lips, “maybe we can go something private?” he took a step towards you.

“No, thank you,” you answered, leaving him while looking for Dawson or Matt.

******  
“I have to throw that dress away,” you said, standing in front of Gaby and Matt.

“No way! you look amazing.” Dawson said, looking at you.

“Yeah, but it brings only creepy guys or horny once...I will pass,” you said, sipping some of the beer Matt gave you.

“Hey you.” you heard Kelly’s voice, “you look...wow,” he adds.

“Hey, you started drinking I see,” you said, a bit scared.

He couldn’t know, no one could. You were afraid of men, drunk men, the men who don’t have respect to you saying no. You took a step back, trying to avoid everything and everyone. You excuse yourself and hide in the only place you could feel safe. The room upstairs, full of your books and Kelly’s big TV placing on the main place. You looked thru the window, the view that could sell that flat for much more than you rent it. You hold your arms, rubbing it gently, you shivered even if the room was warm enough. You were scared.

“Hey,” you heard the male voice again, “are you okay?” Kelly asked.

“Yes, I’m sorry.”

“For what? That party wasn’t the best idea.”

“It was!” you almost shouted, “I’m not the best in partyingl, that’s all.” you bit your lip.

“I’ll tell them that party is over okay?” he said, walking towards you.

“No! I’ll be fine, just give me a second.” you smiled, took a step back.

“(Y/N),” he whispered, “are you...are you scared of me?”

You lifted your sight to meet his icy blue eyes, you bite your lip so hard, you think it will bleed in a moment. Your eyes closed shut, letting your breath, you take a few deep breaths before finally spoke.

“Not you.” you whispered, “I’m afraid of...men, in general.”

“All men?” he asked confused.

“You don’t know everything about me, Kelly. I can’t tell you everything, it’s too dangerous and I don’t want you to be in danger because of me.”

“(Y/N), I want…” he took your hand in his, “there is nothing that will tear us apart you know.” he touched your face, brushing his thumb over your cheek.

“It will..” you said, “I had...a boyfriend.” you started, trying to control your sobs.

“Hey, you don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to.” Kelly interrupted, “we can tell them to go home, take a blanket and cuddle until you fall asleep.”

“I want that.” you murmur, closing your eyes, letting the tears fall on the carpet.

*******  
When you left the room the house became empty. Kelly was saying goodbye to the guests by the door. You looked at him, he was standing tall, trying to get rid off people quickly, but failed every time his friend remind them about good old times.  
You sat on the couch, looking for your favorite fuzzy pink blanket. Kelley made fun of it since day one and you smiled at the memory of it.

“Everyone’s gone.” he smiled, sitting next to you on the couch, “you got fuzzy?”

“Yeah,” you said, laying beside him, your head at his chest.

He was stroking your hair, kissing it gently, he wrapped you in your blanket, making sure you are warm and felt safe. At once you lift herself a bit, looking into his eyes, making sure he is still awake. You put your chin on your hand, placed on his chest, biting your lip.

“His name is Jake. We were together for almost six years.” you took a deep breath, “he was sweet and at the beginning everything was perfect. One day he saw I was talking with a postman, we laugh a bit because he lost my letter for the fifth time...I came back home, asking him what we will have for dinner… he hit me so hard that I lost orientation, I had a concussion and broken ribs.”

“I’ll kill him….” Kelly said, holding you tight.

“It wasn’t the worse..” you add, your eyes filled with tears, you grabbed the hem of his shirt to give yourself a sign of courage, “he raped me. several times, he said I’m his and no one will have me. I’m scared, all the time. I’m scared he will find me.” your voice becomes a whisper.

Kelly’s eyes become bigger, he couldn’t handle the pain, your pain. He wanted to find that guy and kill him with his bare hands. He wanted him to suffer, but at once he looked into your eyes and all that anger went away. You were his soft spot, he hugged you as tight as he could, stroking your back and kissing your hair. He let you cry it out, and when you calm a bit his voice echoed in the empty apartment.

“I promise you for my life, that no one will ever hurt you.” he lifted your chin, “I won’t let anyone touch you,” he whispered, kissing the top of your head.


End file.
